Love

Remember how you said ... "I miss you, sometimes i think 'oh shariza' then get bored'' AHAHA
lol yeah your not the only one ;)

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I had a massive talk with my friend last night.
We literally talked about everything and some things came up.
I told her what i wrote in my last blog, about telling you how my feelings are still growing and how im still falling. Then her face went all weird.
She told me that i do love you already.
And the thing is .. i think shes right.



It explains so much and makes more sense like that.
I didnt want it to happen like this though, i didnt want a friend to tell me i've fallen for you
I wanted to admit it to myself and i wanted to tell you myself whenever i was ready, when it was the right time. But there never is a right time because every day, hour, minute, second is the right time.

She said that i've always loved you, its always been in me the whole time but i havent been feeling it till now. Which is probably true because i told you how some part of me will always love you. It made so much sense after that. I couldnt even sleep last night, i ended up sleeping at like 6am because so much was on my mind.

She told me her point of view with what was happening with us, she reckons that we have really bad timing. Like last year when you started liking me again, my feelings werent as strong so we didnt work. Then this year before i left for Philippines you loved me, but i didnt love you and now i think i do love you but your probably dont love me. We're never at the same level when it comes to our feelings. Even 2 years ago, i was whipped but you werent. There was never a time where we loved eachother equally or felt for eachother the same.

I dont think its a good thing to admit to myself that i love you but its too late. That subject has already passed through and its one of the only things that make sense in this.

Yaknow, i was going to tell you all this whenever we'd talk next but i wouldnt know when it would be, so this is the only way i could tell you things. Its my only form of communication to you.

I really dont get whats stopping us from being together. Like i dont get it. I think about what she said but thats not a big enough reason for us not to be togther, there isnt one unless our feelings have changed.


Okay well thats pretty much all i wanted to say to you.
ily.
Ps. I miss you.



Addicted - Stevie Hoang

".. Do you still of me?
Like i think about you
Do you still dream of me?
'Cause i can't sleep without you
Tell me if time should make a change
Then why do i feel the same?
Your love has got me addicted.. "